My Parenting Decisions: Breastfeeding and Formula Part 1

Feedng Oliver formula.

Nursing Wynter (Andrew didn't want to capture a naked boob)

Breastfeeding vs Formula is often a HUGE topic of controversy and more often than not it stirs up very strong emotions and opinions in people.  Women who choose formula can feel attacked and put down by breastfeeding advocates.  Women who breastfeed sometimes feel isolated by their choice and can also feel attacked by those who have made other choices.

When I struggled, and subsequently failed, at breastfeeding Oliver the guilt and shame caused me to feel that everyone who had succeeded and promoted breastfeeding was personally attacking me.  Of course that wasn't true, but it's how I saw things through my own guilt over not succeeding at what I had expected to be able to do easily.

I hadn't been at all prepared for how difficult it can be to get breastfeeding going.  I thought since it was natural it would come naturally, but it definitely didn't.  I gave up on it fast too because I didn't have the support or the information to be able to work through the problems we had.  So Oliver ended up being formula fed.  It took me a long time to stop feeling guilty.

I think it was my quick failure from before that spurred me on to fight hard after Wynter was born.  I wanted breastfeeding to work this time.  I knew it would be hard, but I was ready to fight.  At first it was easy, then 3 days in it got hard and suddenly I was pumping several times a day and feeding her my milk from a bottle.  This continued on until she was 7 weeks old.  The thing that helped us get breastfeeding back was a nipple shield.  It worked a miracle!  In the matter of just 2 days we went from Wynter not latching at all, to Wynter latching like a natural and no longer needing to pump or use a nipple shield.  She is now nearly 4 months old and the only formula she has is when Andrew and I go out on a date.  Yes, I'm really proud of that.  I have been able to succeed at something I greatly desired and had previously failed at.

Personally, I do believe that breastfeeding is an amazing thing, and is nutritionally better.  That is kind of a proven fact and can't be argued.  However, I can attest to how difficult it can be, and how easy and accessible formula is when breastfeeding is just too hard.  No shame should be felt if you decide breastfeeding isn't for you.  Breastmilk or formula, your child is being fed and that is the most important thing.