My Parenting Decisions: An Installment About Being a New Mom

I'm not having another baby anytime soon.  We're not currently ready for one, financially or emotionally.  We have a lot going on with Oliver right now, and Wynter is developing into her own amazing little person, and all of it is keeping us pretty busy.  However, a few wonderful ladies I know are either pregnant or have a brand new baby, and it's got me thinking about items I would recommend to a new mom, and overall advice I'd give that might make life easier.  So, I thought I'd revive this series, beginning with some general advice for new mom's that isn't often given or thought of.

• Starting a baby registry can be very overwhelming.  There are so many different baby items that seem necessary, and then you've also got brands to worry about, and every brand claims they're the best.  In my opinion there are a few essential items with which brand should matter, aside from those brand is more a matter of opinion and preference.  Here are the things with which I believe brand does matter:
• Car seats (Some are truly safer and more reliable than others.  Do your research.)
• Breast Pumps (Check the La Leche League website for recommendations.)
• Baby Carriers (Check out Babywearing International for more information.)
• Along the same lines, following a registry guideline list might be helpful.  You can google "baby registry checklist" and find many good ones. That way you can check things off as you add them and you won't forget anything.  Add anything you really want, even if you might not really need it. Friends with kids will likely get you what you need, like diapers, wipes, clippers, onesies, etc; friends without kids are more likely to buy cute baby outfits, blankets, stuffed animals, etc.  Family and close friends are more likely to buy the more expensive items.  (This is all simply my experience.)
•  There is so much anticipation regarding the arrival of baby, the after baby arrives can be overlooked.  As a new mom, you'll be very tired and you'll need to take it easy for at least a few weeks.  You'll need people bringing you meals, or have meals in the freezer that can be quickly popped in a pot, slow cooker, or the oven.  It is more than okay to ask family and friends to help with housework, especially if you're getting behind (which is pretty likely those first few weeks to months).
• Are you planning on breastfeeding?  Know ahead of time that it can be easy for some lucky Mamas, but for many it is actually much more difficult to get going.  If you don't have people around you to answer your questions, or help you when you need it, you might turn to formula.  If you do turn to formula you might feel like a failure, or guilty for giving up on breastfeeding.  Please try to remember that whether your baby gets breastmilk or formula your baby is getting fed.
• There has been some recent negativity regarding co-sleeping, more specifically bed-sharing.  I wrote about this before so you can refer back to that post for my personal experience, or you can check out information from Dr. James McKenna.  You will find medical professionals who are adamantly against co-sleeping/bed-sharing too.  Personally, I believe it can be practiced safely.  It's really a personal decision.  Don't let anyone make you feel bad one way or the other.  Choose what works best for you and your family, and be open to changing your mind because you can't know what will end up working best until after baby is home with you.

There are many more things to think about, but for me the above were issues I hadn't thought would be all that important, and ended up being some of the most important issues for us.  Other things like where I would give birth to my kids, whether or not I wanted an epidural, what kind of diapers (cloth or disposable) we would use, either ended up being chosen for us or just weren't all that important at the time.

I think it's important to know the issues that will affect you greatest, research them, read about personal experiences or talk to family and friends about what they found to be the best for them, and then be ready to change your mind even if you think you know exactly what you want.  My decisions changed drastically from child to child, and that's okay.  It's a process, figuring out how to be a parent, and it's constantly changing.  If something isn't working, don't be afraid to try something new and figure out what does work for you and your family.  You'll be doing that all through parenthood.