Where it all started...

It's been an interesting journey for me, getting to where I am now.  Just two years ago I would have mostly balked at the idea of headship and submission in marriage, but part of me would have also been eager to learn more.  In fact, part of me has been longing all my life for that in marriage, but I never would have seriously voiced that longing because in the face of society today it seemed wrong.  Honestly, my view of it was off kilter too.  I had this longing for what I saw as the 50's marriage, I wanted to be the perfect little wife, with the perfect little home, and perfect little children, and yes I wanted my someday husband- at that point in life- to be "the boss".  And although I longed for this, I felt it was wrong of me, so I kept it mostly hidden and instead cultivated what I was taught: in-dependency, feminism, that women are at least equal to men (if not better).  I was taught by society how to walk all over a man, how to use my femininity to get what I wanted, I was even taught that women could be stronger, smarter, and overall better than men.  I never would have said any of those things, but my attitude toward men spoke it in volumes!

I feel blessed that it only took us 1 year of marriage before we realized that we had it all wrong.  God mercifully brought friends into our lives that pointed us in the right direction.  I learned that what society had taught me, and even my own secret longings did not line up with God's plan for marriage.  Ephesians 5:22-27 tells us that the marriage relationship is to mirror Christ and His church.  Just as Christ leads, shepherds, and sacrificially loves His church, husbands are to lead, shepherd, and sacrificially love their wives.  And just as the church submits to Christ's leadership, wives are to submit to the leadership of their husbands.  This was eye opening for me. 

I have no where near perfected this calling to submit, I am human after all, but I strive for it daily.  Some days are easier than others, some days it feels impossible, but this calling is on my mind and heart daily.  I am eager to learn more about what submission means and how to practically apply it in day to day life, and I am eager to apply it.  I believe I will always be learning new things about being a godly wife, or godly mother, and I will always struggle because of sin, but it is because of my past struggles and even my current struggles that I desire to share this journey with others so that some might be encouraged or learn what I have about God's call to wives and mothers.  And that is what this blog is for, sharing my journey into biblical womanhood for the purpose of teaching and/or encouraging other young women (whether you have grown up learning all of this, or like me you are just learning it, or have yet to discover it).